And there are some things you should be able to see at night but you can’t because the glow of the city has blunted their glow.
Some of you city folk might not know the glory of being out in a field miles away from city lights and looking up at all the stars. It’s captivating. Breath-taking. God’s promise to Abraham is far bigger when you’re out in the open land. If it’s the right time of the month you don’t need a flashlight, the glow of the moon is enough to light your path. There is something serene and awe-inspiring about seeing all the stars when they aren’t competing with our man-made lights. Isaiah 50:10-11 reminded me of this:
10 Who among you fears the Lord
and obeys the voice of his servant?
Let him who walks in darkness
and has no light
trust in the name of the Lord
and rely on his God.
11 Behold, all you who kindle a fire,
who equip yourselves with burning torches!
Walk by the light of your fire,
and by the torches that you have kindled!
This you have from my hand:
you shall lie down in torment.
Isaiah 50:3 tells us that God had brought darkness upon the Israelites because of their unfaithfulness. There are things which they would not be able to see unless it was dark. But what did the people do? They complained about God’s working with them and they pursued other avenues of help. They, as Isaiah 50:11 warns against, lit torches.
When I hear the word darkness I tend to think of depression and anxiety. God has brought me an incredible amount of victory in this area, but I still remember days of darkness. I remember groping around for anything to give me even a spark of light. Truth be told, I lit quite a few matches. I was desperate. But a desperate rebel. At times I was angry at God. I didn’t want to wait for His hand. I didn’t want to trust in His means or rely upon His Word when my feelings were all out of whack. I just wanted to feel better. So I started my own fires.
And in the glow of my fire I couldn’t see God as brightly. My fires didn’t warm me. It didn’t provide proper light. It always fizzled and died down. And then I’d get angry with God. Why had he abandoned me in the darkness? Why would he bring rain to douse the feeble sparks I’d labored so hard to generate?
But it wasn’t that he had abandoned me. It was that my own torches blinded me to His redemption. I couldn’t see the radiant stars because of the borrowed glory of my flickering matches. And I, much like Jonah and his silly little plant, became enamored with the sparks from my own comfort. I labored harder and harder to keep those flames going. My, what a fool I must have looked like. Eternal glory, radiant light, every spiritual blessing already mine but I’m playing with sticks trying to manufacture a glimmer of light.
When we find ourselves in the darkness we cannot make having light our goal. This is why being driven by emotions is so dangerous. If emotions are our goal then any ol’ spark will do, so long as we have a bit of light for the moment. Our goal must be to have true light. Ever notice the word “true light” in John 1:9. That means there are no so true lights. Only Christ will last. And even a flicker of grace from His hand is enough to capture us for all eternity. But sometimes we can’t see those sparks because we are so enamored with our own torches.
Don’t grab the matches. Wait for his light.
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